Yesterday I was on the hunt for a new Tokyo sweet shop that had opened in Gurgaon. I was excited because a friend of mine had told me about a wonderful chocolate, banana crepe that they made and I was desperate to try one.
My driver parked our car at this local outdoor shopping area called the Vashant Lok. I get out of the car and start to wander around the market looking for the store when I suddenly feel a tap, tap, tap on my arm. I look down and I have been surrounded by about 5 little girls. They have dirty faces, hallow eyes, and seeking hands.
My driver has warned me about children like this whose parents send them to the local markets to beg for money from the people that are shopping there. Sushil, my driver, said that most of these people get more money if their children do the begging than if they worked a regular job. The parents lounge in the shade while the children do the work. Many of the parents even train the kids on how to pick pockets. Several other friends of ours have said that if you offer the parents a job (like gardening, etc) for you that they will decline because they make more money begging. They let the kids beg for them because it is harder to turn down a child....which definitely is the case. The parents are probably standing over to side watching this as their children beg me for money.
Very quickly the 5 children turn into 10 little faces. I am trying to get away. I have my bag strung cross body to keep the kids from grabbing it and I keep trying to shoo them away but they will not leave me alone. They tap on my hands (my rings and bracelets). They tap on top of my bag. They tap my clothes. Tap, tap, tap.
I keep walking and try to shoo them away. I realize that no one else is getting attacked like this. The other people are looking at me but none of them are being pestered in this manner. It occurs to me that I am the only white lady in this market hence why I was the target. I sternly turn around and say "No." Several of the children leave. The rest follow me for a while until I find my sweet store and head in. An Indian lady comes into the shop right behind me and tells me in her beautiful English that I did the right thing. "Those kids will steal from you if you let them. Trust me they are a menace. Whatever happens do not give them money or they will never let you leave."
I am heart broken by this. Those poor children. Tap, tap, tap. Hungry faces. Tap, tap, tap. Thieving hands. Tap, tap, tap. I start to think that India is making me cold hearted. In the moment I was concerned for myself (specifically my purse and jewelry). Heart broken by their little faces but would could I do. Give them money and I would have been pick pocketed as I dug into my purse for sure. Give them food from the sweet shop and the parents would have been the only beneficiaries. It nagged me for hours afterwards.
Later I shared this with a friend of mine who said, "Lisa you have to be careful here. Some people in India, not all, will try to take advantage of you and not think anything about taking things from you outright."
I have lived in India long enough to know this but in the US I was the lady who gave money to the guy on the street corner holding the home made sign asking for help (yes I know he might have used it to buy alcohol but what if he didn't). I built houses for Habitat for Humanity and cooked meals for the elder care program "Meals on Wheels." I set up volunteer programs in the workplace. Maybe I did that because there was a time my family struggled too and needed a little help.
I do volunteer here in Gurgaon as well but something tells me those little kids (and their shady parents) from the local market will continue to nag at me for days to come. Tap, tap, tapping at the back of my mind. Always there. Always present.
My driver parked our car at this local outdoor shopping area called the Vashant Lok. I get out of the car and start to wander around the market looking for the store when I suddenly feel a tap, tap, tap on my arm. I look down and I have been surrounded by about 5 little girls. They have dirty faces, hallow eyes, and seeking hands.
My driver has warned me about children like this whose parents send them to the local markets to beg for money from the people that are shopping there. Sushil, my driver, said that most of these people get more money if their children do the begging than if they worked a regular job. The parents lounge in the shade while the children do the work. Many of the parents even train the kids on how to pick pockets. Several other friends of ours have said that if you offer the parents a job (like gardening, etc) for you that they will decline because they make more money begging. They let the kids beg for them because it is harder to turn down a child....which definitely is the case. The parents are probably standing over to side watching this as their children beg me for money.
Very quickly the 5 children turn into 10 little faces. I am trying to get away. I have my bag strung cross body to keep the kids from grabbing it and I keep trying to shoo them away but they will not leave me alone. They tap on my hands (my rings and bracelets). They tap on top of my bag. They tap my clothes. Tap, tap, tap.
I keep walking and try to shoo them away. I realize that no one else is getting attacked like this. The other people are looking at me but none of them are being pestered in this manner. It occurs to me that I am the only white lady in this market hence why I was the target. I sternly turn around and say "No." Several of the children leave. The rest follow me for a while until I find my sweet store and head in. An Indian lady comes into the shop right behind me and tells me in her beautiful English that I did the right thing. "Those kids will steal from you if you let them. Trust me they are a menace. Whatever happens do not give them money or they will never let you leave."
I am heart broken by this. Those poor children. Tap, tap, tap. Hungry faces. Tap, tap, tap. Thieving hands. Tap, tap, tap. I start to think that India is making me cold hearted. In the moment I was concerned for myself (specifically my purse and jewelry). Heart broken by their little faces but would could I do. Give them money and I would have been pick pocketed as I dug into my purse for sure. Give them food from the sweet shop and the parents would have been the only beneficiaries. It nagged me for hours afterwards.
Later I shared this with a friend of mine who said, "Lisa you have to be careful here. Some people in India, not all, will try to take advantage of you and not think anything about taking things from you outright."
I have lived in India long enough to know this but in the US I was the lady who gave money to the guy on the street corner holding the home made sign asking for help (yes I know he might have used it to buy alcohol but what if he didn't). I built houses for Habitat for Humanity and cooked meals for the elder care program "Meals on Wheels." I set up volunteer programs in the workplace. Maybe I did that because there was a time my family struggled too and needed a little help.
I do volunteer here in Gurgaon as well but something tells me those little kids (and their shady parents) from the local market will continue to nag at me for days to come. Tap, tap, tapping at the back of my mind. Always there. Always present.
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